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Showing posts from January, 2012

Quick One! Seems God also uses Photoshop

Did anyone see the fog out in Baltimore today? It looked as if God applied a gaussian blur filter to make everything look dreamy and romantic...unless you're driving and it's just poor visibility as far as you're concerned.

Quick One! Why Do You Listen to California Love?

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Why do you listen to "California Love"? 2pac's rap? Roger Troutman's talk-boxing taken from Ronnie Hudson & The Street People's "West Coast Poplock"? Catchy music taken from Joe Coker's "Woman to Woman"? The masterful Dr Dre for brilliantly putting it all together?

My Alien Abduction Survival Story

The ETs now have me where they've wanted me...at my wits' end and on my knees, completely at their mercy. They have my attention alright, howbeit not undivided. My wife is dying in excruciating pain and it's all their doing. They'd implanted the alien pod that had been growing inside her and was now trying to claw its way out of her belly. Okay maybe it wasn't all their doing. If only I hadn't been so stupid to get us in such a compromising situation. The aliens should never have captured us in the first place. It should have been some poor unlucky slob in my place. I'm a trained soldier, my instincts have been honed to avoid scenarios like this. Funnily enough they'd treated us nicely. None of the lower gastrointestinal probing we hear about in those abduction stories. Just strange heavenly lights and strange heavenly sounds. It was like heaven for the relatively brief period we were there. We were grateful to have been spared. Not many make it back t

What Am I Here For? With Lyrics

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Quick One! That New Coke Fiasco

I tweeted earlier that "By itself, the introduction of New Coke wasn't dumb. It was the immediate removal of old Coke that made it dumb. Gotta respect the old fans." If I had it to do today, I would represent old Coke as a champion super hero. I would then introduce New Coke as a challenger to the championship and open the lines for voting. I would create video campaigns with the two of them duking it out. CGI animation, cool costumes, 'uber pwnage', you name it. If New Coke wins, I would declare him the new champion, but guess what...I still wouldn't phase out old Coke! Who says the two cannot coexist?